Thursday, November 1, 2007

A different landscape

He's disrespectful
He hangs up on you when he get's mad.
Sometimes he curses at you, and that's not right.
When you are a lady outside but a freak in his room, he betrays you by bringing it up later as a 'comeback'.
He makes you feel stupid for even being with him....
but you can't leave him alone because you can't imagine your life without him.
You are stuck.

You can't trust him.
Can't trust that he will change.
You don't really want him to change who he is...you love that about him.
But you want him to love you the way he says he does, to respect you the way he says he does, to deliver the promise of a future that he said....
And yet he takes you through mind games
and underminds you-breaks his promises...
You've come unglued.

But this is your love.
It's nowhere near perfect.
The book has been written, but he won't read the words so you're stuck reading them yourself and you realize that the relationship isn't a partnership, only an entity.
But you stay.

You stay because nobody can take you from who you are.
You are strong because you've come to understand that nobody is perfect and that ultimatly, he needs you.
He needs you to let him vent.
He needs you to stand by his side.
And in your darkest moment, he'll do the same for you.
He wants no other...he will not cheat....he shows you his good side and bad side and has shown you that he's just a man and not perfect and that is okay with you.
You see his love when he steals glances at you.
You feel his love when you sleep at night and your heartbeats beat to the same drum.
He loves you more than he's ever loved anyother woman.
And that's why he acts up-because sometimes he's afraid because if he loses you, he has lost it all.
It's his way...and it's your choice.
You choose to stay because despite all the bad things, the peace that you feel when you think of him is the truth.
That's who you love.
He's your man even when he acts like a little boy.
And though some may call you stupid, in the end, they don't matter.
In the end, they can't live your life for you.
And no matter what they may say, their grass is no greener than yours-it's just a different landscape.
Copyright ©2007 Attica Lundy

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